By Dave Cockrum

People have been asking how I’m feeling. Well, I haven’t been out of bed much since December. You might know that already. But last night, I dreamed that I was in a truck convoy with Lois Lane. God only knows why it was Lois Lane. Well, I guess I know why.

Anyway, it was raining and it was nighttime, and there was thunder and lightening. Suddenly I realized that I had to go to the bathroom.

“Me, too,” said Lois.

So we tried to pull the truck over to the side, but I ended up wrecking the truck.

We got out and there was debris everywhere?trees and rocks and pieces of truck. I didn’t know what to do!

So I was running through all of this stuff and suddenly I wound up in the actual bathroom here at the nursing home. I mean, I woke up. And that’s where I was.

I looked out from the can and it dawned on me that I had basically run through a gauntlet of wheelchairs and guest chairs and beds and stuff to get to the bathroom, which was all the way on the other side of the room. But I didn’t hit anything, or at least I didn’t fall down.

For someone who is not supposed to be able to walk unassisted, that was a pretty nice bit of athletics.

I have no idea whether Lois made it.

[As told to Clifford Meth.]

© 2004 Dave Cockrum/Clifford Meth

Want to help Dave get out of the hospital, go home and live happily ever after? Stop wasting time! Order The Uncanny Dave Cockrum Tribute. It’s got brand new art from Neal Adams, Joe Quesada, Will Eisner, Dave Gibbons, John Romita, Gene Colan, Walt Simonson, and a lot of other nifty artists. And it’s got new written material from Harlan Ellison, Neil Gaiman, Alan Moore, Stan Lee, and a lot of terrific writers. And it’s also a pretty nice book? What are you waiting for?

© 2004, Clifford Meth

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