Cue That Music from The Natural Where Robert Redford Hits the Homerun into the Lights
Today marks a significant achievement in the history of All The Rage, as I pass previous columnist J. Hues on the all-time list for number of columns written. Hues’ previous mark of 3 ATR features had remained unbroken for 4 long weeks. In honor of this incredible achievement I decided to sit down with myself to find out how I feel about the accomplishment and writing ATR in general.

So, now that you have scored 4 columns, what is it like to bitch slap Hues down to the lowest level on the totem pole?

It’s fantastic. Stepping on Hues with my filthy boot was a goal I made for myself early on when I accepted the gig. Now that he’s finally been stomped to the bottom I feel like there’s a lot more damn leg room in the ATR pad.

But let me give you the obligatory, unselfish quote: I have to say that I couldn’t have done it without the love of my girlfriend and my family, who despite not knowing anything about comics, supported my aspiration of beating Hues. And I can’t forget all those drunken nights spent with my friends, whose inebriated antics inspired me to not only pursue the dream, but to metaphorically crush people beneath a bulbous heel. They truly gave me the strength.. nay, the knowledge, to get where I am today. Oh, and God too. I’m supposed to thank God, right?

After 4 columns do you feel like you have a handle on this whole rumor thing?

Hell no. Before I took the job I was hesitant to write a rumor column because I didn’t have a clue where to find the necessary material. Still don’t. Luckily there are some kind people out there who help me every week. I was also a little concerned that people in the industry might get pissed off by the things I write. There are a lot of negative rumors floating around. But if someone gets bent out of shape over something I write, they always have the opportunity to drop me a line and set the record straight. And I hope they do. I’m not trying to plant evil seeds in the industry. This little column doesn’t have that kind of power anyway. It’s just a place to hear some possibilities and have a good time.

Have you pissed anyone off?

Most people have been really great. Even if they don’t want to comment, they have been nice about it. And this week Geoff Johns (The Flash, Hawkman) actually volunteered information. How cool is that?

Yeah, yeah, but you didn’t answer the question. Who have you ticked off, Naso?

Theme from The Natural abruptly ends

Hey, don’t you have a column to get to, you nosy bitch?

Er… Thanks for your time, pal.

If anyone wants to congratulate me on my accomplishment, please send gifts. I also accept cashiers checks and money orders, as well as gold teeth and giant clock necklaces. Now, on to the rumors. Not much commentary this week because I’m cranky.

And unless you want to see me crankier still, you’ll click on one the banner or buttons scattered about this page and visit the website of our sponsor, Dynamic Forces. If you hurry, and I really mean hurry, you’ll be able to score yourself today’s Daily Special, which is the ultimate Origin six-pack of signed comics. You’ll get: Origin #1 signed by Paul Jenkins and Andy Kubert, Origin #2 signed by Paul Jenkins and Andy Kubert, Origin #3 signed by Paul Jenkins and Andy Kubert, Origin #4 signed by Paul Jenkins, Origin #5 signed by Andy Kubert, and Origin #6 signed by Herb Trimp and Richard Isanove.

Here’s what my pal Toney T, from DF Customer Service told me about the special:

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Retaining the Title

Last week I ran a story about Marvel possibly shafting Stan Lee and Jack Kirby by removing their creator credits on the Hulk film. Apparently this rumor is not true.

Harry from the Ain’t It Cool News website contacted Marvel movie guy Avi Arad about the rumor this week and found out that Kirby and Lee will get credit. The credit will apparently read: “Based on the Marvel Characters as created by Stan Lee & Jack Kirby”.

Thanks to The Thief for the tip.

This Has A “Credit Approval” Factor Of Nine Out Of Ten

Maximum Output

In other Marvel news, I hear that writer Daniel Way will be stepping up his production on Venom to 18 issues a year. Supposedly, he has two Epic books, and an Ant-Man mini for MAX coming out as well.

This Has A “Saying Ant-Man Mini Is Kind Of Redundant” Factor Of Seven Out Of Ten

Brand New Ventures

Noble Causes writer Jay Faerber has been busy lately. Aside from the Noble Causes: Extended Family 80-page anthology issue coming out in May, I hear he plans to do a Frost one-shot soon. For those of you who don’t know, Frost is an estranged, ice-powered guy from Noble Causes. I’m told a second Noble Causes TPB will be released in the Fall as well.

But the real scoop is that Jay is supposedly working on two new projects. The first is called Dodge’s Bullets. It’s a black and white private eye mini-series for Image. My source tells me Jay has three issues in the bag and is just waiting for the book to be drawn. No word on who the artist might be. The other rumor I’m hearing is that Jay has a spy thriller is development called Switch.

And finally, the word on Jay’s current Image superhero book, Venture, is that it will be cancelled after issue four. I’m told Venture may return as a series of one-shots, but the future of the property hasn’t been decided yet.

This Has A “Superhero Switch Turned Off” Factor Of Seven Out Of Ten

Find and Fill

For the hell of it I decided to contact two of my favorite indie creators to find out if they have pitched Epic or plan to do so in the near future. Rick Spears, kick ass writer of (Teenagers From Mars) and Carla Speed McNeil, who writes, draws and letters her excellent tribal, sci-fi series Finder, both talked a little about the prospect.

Mr. Rick Spears:

      “Nope we haven’t pitched anything to Marvel/Epic yet. We’re pretty busy with

Teenagers From Mars

      and a graphic novels called


      we’re doing for AIT/PLANET LAR right now. And because we’re comfortable with self-publishing it’s not such a big deal for us, but we’ll see what happens to the first batch of books they put out. As far as working on Marvel characters I really like

Mort the Dead Teenager


I asked Rick about Filler and he sent me this description of the book:


      is an OGN Rob and I are doing for AIT/ PLANET LAR. We wanted to do something very different to follow Teenagers and this is it.


    is a very dark noir style story full of hard luck losers, pimps, prostitutes, brass knuckles and black widows. It’s a 90 page OGN that will be out near the end of the year and we talked Larry into printing it in black, white and red.

Look for a Batman backup story from Rick and Rob G in Detective Comics as well. It’s slated to begin in July. For more information on Teenagers From Mars visit

And now, the lovely and talented Carla Speed McNeil:

      Well, I certainly appreciate your thinking of me, but unfortunately I don’t have anything to report. I haven’t pitched anything to EPIC and I’m pretty sure I’m not going to… I just have too much to do right now, and I don’t have any story burning a hole in my pocket that I can’t do in



As for existing Marvel characters done MY way, uh… again, I really don’t know who they’d be. I doubt seriously they’d let me turn Gambit into either a man-whore or a paving-construction worker (like most of the Cajuns I knew growing up if they weren’t working offshore oil rigs).

Carla is currently working on an arc of Queen & Country with writer Greg Rucka. Her first issue (Q&C #16) will be out on May 28. Finder #30 is on sale now. Buy it at your finest local comic shop, or visit

This Has A “Spicy Cajun Prostitute” Factor Of Eight Out Of Ten

Emma Iced

While we’re on the subject of Queens, I’m told Sean McKeever wrote an Emma Frost one-shot over a year ago and it has yet to be solicited. Drew Johnson and Rick Ketcham are the artists on the project. My sources tell me that the book probably won’t be released until later this year, but there’s a possibility that it could be shelved indefinitely. No reason was given, but the new ongoing series featuring the life and times of the diabolical White Queen may be the reason. Marvel may want to prevent Emma overkill.

Update: Comments from Sean McKeever

    Thought I’d clear up a rumor you had on the site this week. I usually don’t comment on rumors, but Mike Marts actually announced the project online a couple weeks back, so it’s not really a rumor anymore.

I actually did write a four-issue Emma Frost story that was meant to be one of the Icons mini-series but got shelved for various reasons. Drew and Rick are indeed the artists on the tale, which I believe will not see print until the second half of 2004 at the earliest, if ever.

However, my first new Marvel series, Sentinel, appears to be picking up critical and sales steam, plus my second new Marvel series, Inhumans, is still scheduled to launch on May 28. It just so happens that I have details on these books over at, for those interested in such things.

This Has A “In That Outfit Emma is Already Over-Exposed” Factor Of Five Out Of Ten

Hulk the Man Now, Dawg

With the new Hulk movie just around the corner there are a lot of fans concerned about the quality of the CGI in the film. Rumor has it that director Ang Lee is still trying to work out the bugs and tweak the animated sequences. There has also been talk that some of the Hulk scenes are even based on Lee’s own movements. Personally I’m not that wigged by the Hulk images shown in recent commercials, but I ran across a report on an ILM’s (Industrial Light & Magic’s) Wondercon presentation at,20030427,5847 that sheds some light on the techniques used to bring the Hulk to life.

Apparently much of the presentation was about ILM’s efforts to create a convincing human being, albeit on a super-sized scale. The report says that a “Hulk Book” containing various comic book pages was used “as a frame of reference for the CGI Hulk.”

The report also mentions that “Ang Lee would often request that certain scenes in the movie mimic if not down right copy specific comic book frames.” The director also decided that the Hulk should be fast and agile, and move more like an athlete than a lumbering behemoth.

Aside from the CGI, word on the street is that Hulk is definitely more of an arthouse film, filled with drama and tragedy, and will not be your typical superhero smack-em up despite what we’ve seen in the commercials. In fact, I’m hearing that the studio executives are now quite nervous. They are worried that the film will be too artsy for the general movie-going public expecting to see things get blowed up.

This Has A “Gamma Dogs Make Great Pets” Factor Of Six Out Of Ten


Hawkman and JSA writer Geoff Johns took it upon himself to e-mail me about a new project in the works with his former collaborator on The Flash, Scott Kolins.

    Scott Kolins is doing his FIRST writing work by co-writing a B.P.R.D. one-shot with me coming out in September. He’s just finished the cover and will begin illustrating it in the next month. It stars Liz, Roger and Lobster Johnson.

Thanks Geoff.

This Has A “Taste the Buttery Justice of the Lobster’s Claw!” Factor Of Nine Out Of Ten

X Marks The Exit

And last but not least Chuck Austen has decided to leave the X-Fan message boards because some of the posters there are dicks. Here’s an excerpt of his farewell message, posted on Saturday:

    I know there are a lot of fans of my work here. I know there are far more pros than cons about what I do. I know that many of you love and enjoy the interaction we have here, and I have to say most of the time, I’ve enjoyed it as well.

But the level of vitriol and personal bias I too often find here, particularly what appears to be sanctioned bias by moderators and critics, is draining and exhausting, and takes away from the positive aspects of this site. Criticism I can handle. But libel is a little tough to take. So, unfortunately, once again, the jerks have ruined it for the rest.

What I’m getting at, here, is a resignation from X-Fan.

I have supported this site and will continue to do so. I will sign all the autographs anyone wants, and do any interviews that are requested of me. The folks who run this site have done a wonderful job of creating a terrific place for fans to come and hang out, chat and get to know one another, and they police it well. But as the popularity of my writing and Uncanny continue to grow, the volume of commentary is hard for me to handle, and I’d rather not deal with the anger of those select few who feel they have the right to say whatever they want about me personally … simply because I’ve “screwed” with their favorite comic book character.

To read the entire message visit

This Has A “Comic Fans Have Way Too Much Time To F@$% With People” Factor Of Ten Out Of Ten


PS If anyone has any rumors to share please send them to me immediately. Just click on my name at the top of the page and you’re halfway there. If you don’t want your name revealed then just give me an alias or let me know that you don’t want to be mentioned in any way. Thanks to everyone who has been sending stuff in. It’s appreciated.

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