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Wonder Woman #212

Posted: Friday, January 21, 2005
By: Ray Tate



"Counting Coup"

Writer: Greg Rucka
Artists: James Raiz(p), Ray Snyder(i), Tanya and Richard Horie(c)
Publisher: DC

Wonder Woman's "Counting Coup" should really be called "Blind Stupidity." On the behest of Batman, the Justice League attempt to test the magically blinded Diana in order to determine whether or not she is still fit to serve in their little club. I have a question, has anybody tested Batman to see if he is still fit to serve in the League?

This continuity clod who now hasn't even the shrewd intellect of Hong-Kong Phooey let alone his pre-Crisis counterpart, the Michael Keaton avatar or his Timm-animated incarnation has systematically ruined Gotham, killed an innocent girl and showed his lack of detective skills by missing a put-up job attempted murder that furthermore led to the death of a boy's father--the very antithesis of what Batman is supposed to do. This lack-witted psychotic has got a lot of nerve to test Wonder Woman, and no it's not in his character because the test is as dull as his acumen.

The cover explains how the cowled dolt tests Diana, and the test does not indicate a thing. All it registers is the ineptitude of the so-called "World's Mightiest Heroes." Plastic Man as a beach ball attacks Wonder Woman. I guess he saw Dark Star one evening. The Flash, who is at first slower than a beach ball, is the only one who eventually puts in any effort. J'onn fails to shape shift. Black Canary hasn't been a League member for years, and she's so rusty that she apparently has completely forgot to unleash her Canary Cry, a devastating weapon that would give Diana pause. She does however unleash her Canary Cleavage. They're not the organs that vibrate, honey.

The League then wise up. Indeed. Rather than stupidly attack Wonder Woman individually. They stupidly attack en masse. Only the Flash uses his powers. J'onn doesn't even use his heat vision. Plas turns into Popeye, but so what? This wouldn't affect Wonder Woman. Turn into something useful like a cage. This sad denouement leads to the finale of the scene where Superman fires a .45 Automatic to see if she can deflect the bullet. She's blind you moron! Not slow! Clearly, the slow ones are in the Watchtower and led by a certain Dim Knight. You really want to test Diana, play a game of capture the flag. Don't try to beat on her. You want to test whether her blindness hampers her ability to strategize. In battle you want a person who can take out the opposition not withstand assault.

Apart from this utterly inane exercise in drivel, other episodes in the book touch on the subplots. There's the predictable one with Athena calling upon her champion to contend against Zeus' champion in order for she to seize the throne of Olympus. Hint, the solution is in the bag. Go watch Clash of the Titans. Then we have the unwittingly hilarious notion of the petrified boy becoming his own gravestone. The pigeons I'm sure will love him.



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