Current Reviews


Flaming Carrot Comics #3

Posted: Monday, June 27, 2005
By: Michael Deeley

W/A: Bob Burden
Pub: Image/Desperado
Price: $3.95 USD, (But I got a free copy SUCKERS!)

Rarely does a comic make me laugh out loud. ‘Groo’ sometimes did. Giffen’s and DeMatties’ new Justice League stories do. But none made laugh like ‘Flaming Carrot Comics’ #3. It was a good hearty chuckle, the kind where you laugh with the character who’s laughing at himself. Carrot is played for a fool in this issue and he’s not the least bit mad.

FC is rescuing a baby werewolf from a magnetic adventurer when Dynamite Girl comes to town. DG is looking for a giant criminal hot wing. She seduces the Carrot into helping her and keeping away other amorous heroes. The chase leads to several people getting “whooped” by the wing, a rodeo, and Dr. Phil. Neil Gaiman is also name checked.

The Flaming Carrot comics have always been bizarre, but I think this story reaches new levels of weirdness without entering other dimensions. The story takes improbable twists that make perfect sense. FC once again proves his superior abilities through skill and stupidity by defeating a villain with a yo-yo, bronco-riding the wing, and entering his state of “zen stupidity”. It helps him “understand the stupid criminal mind and face the jaws of death better!” That would be an invaluable weapon in fighting crime. You have to be stupid to risk your life for nothing. And in the Flaming Carrot’s world, stupidity is a force of nature. It drives nearly every action; it’s the force behind every character’s decision. Everyone in this town is stupid! How else could a giant hot wing disguise himself with just a hat? The Flaming Carrot is the only person who’s both stupid AND brave enough to fight evil.

By the end of the story, Flaming Carrot realizes he was hoodwinked by Dynamite Girl. But he can’t hate her; he let himself be played for a fool. I like her too. Dynamite girl is bold, brassy, and sassy. Like every woman drawn by Burden, she’s got wide hips, thick legs, and is built like a brick outhouse. She’s unlike most comic book women. Fortunately, she’ll be getting her own series soon. Watch out for it.

In the interest of full disclosure, I must say Bob Burden sent me a free ashcan copy of the comic a month before it was released. I’ve held off reviewing it until the comic hit the stands. Now when I tell you, “Go buy this you tiny-brained worms”, you can obey me. It could be the best comic on sale this week. It’s certainly better than anything Marvel put out this week.

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