By Beau Smith
We all have our times when we think best. Mine happens to be when I’m drivin’ in the truck, takin’ the dogs on patrol or takin’ a shower. In all cases I’ve got music playin’. It seems to be the perfect mix for creative thought. I’ve gotta say that my thinkin’ in the shower is my best. All lathered up with manly soap, wet, warm water shimmerin’ across my manly body? Ok! That’s enough! I can feel you women lookin’ at me like I was a piece of U.S. Grade Prime Beef. (And you know I am) As for you guys?get that picture of me out of your mind. Ya wanna feel insecure for the rest of your life? That’s what happens when ya try and compare your puny self to me! Kinda like starin’ straight into the sun. You’ll go blind or crazy.
It was while performin’ these manly activities I’ve come up with some of the most fun creations that have ever staggered out of my manly head in a creative drunken stupor. I figured I’d share one of em’ with you because my family thinks I’m nutty and they ignore me. My dogs will only voice an opinion if there’s a dog treat involved.
Growin’ up I used to devour those great Doc Savage paperbacks with the James Bama painted covers. The stories were always exciting and well told. Doc Savage was the manliest of all pulp fiction heroes. I loved the whole set up of Doc bein’ the smartest guy in the world, one of the richest and still able to fist fight anything that got in his way. I loved his group of manly men with special talents. The stories always gave ya just enough of each one of em’ to make ya want even more. I could hardly wait until the next book came out so I could learn even more about Doc and his butt kickin’ buddies. Doc Savage was an inspiration to me when I created Buck Wargo and The Monster Hunters durin’ my two-year run on Guy Gardner: Warrior.
Of course I put my own spin on it. Buck Wargo was one of the richest men in the world. His family made their money back in the 1800’s by startin’ one of the largest cattle ranches in America. Then they multiplied their millions into billions with oil and finally topped it all off by being 10 years ahead of everyone in computers.
Buck Wargo-He’s a cowboy, scientist, former football star, explorer, and all round expert on everything. He has an amazing team of adventurers that are special experts in their own fields.
Joey Hong-Top in his class at M.I.T. One of the world’s leading experts on computers and electronics. He also has a Ph.D in paleontology as well as being one of the foremost martial artists ever.
Rita Muldoon-Ph.D in zoology, top fitness expert. Customized small arms inventor and was taught hand to hand combat by her father, former mixed martial arts heavy weight champ and Navy Seal, “Iron” Mike Muldoon.
Desmond Farr-Desmond comes from “Old Money”. He had a twin brother, Dean, who was the first “Tiger Man Of Burma.” Upon his brother’s death, Desmond gained the powers of the Tiger Man. Being able to transform into the strongest were-tiger in the world. In extreme moments he is able to amp up into the ultimate Tiger Man form where his fur becomes black with white stripes as opposed to his regular state of orange and black. We showed this form in a later issue of Guy Gardner: Warrior.
Veronna-She is the mightiest warrior of the Nabba Jungle. From a race of warrior women, whose army has stood off the most powerful invaders in the world through the ages. Not only is she an incredible fighter, but she is an expert with all primitive weapons and hand to hand combat. Very strong and has limited mental powers that allow her some telepathy.
Lady Blackhawk-The expert pilot and bad guy thrasher from the pages of DC’s Blackhawk comics. Zinda is a blonde bombshell that can fly any kind of flying machine. She’s a high level hand to hand combatant and weapons expert. She favors a Thompson machine gun. Lucky for all you readers, she is now featured in the pages of Birds Of Prey! Check it out.
Buck Wargo and The Monster Hunters first appeared in Guy Gardner: Warrior #22 and #23. It was in those two issues that they showed the readers what action and adventure was all about as they went up against dino riding Nazis and perhaps Hitler himself, all in the jungles of South America. Did I mention that Guy joined up with them as they helped him find the Warrior Water that would gain him new powers?
Buck and The Monster Hunters became the regular supporting cast for Guy after these issues. It was Buck that financed the bar Warrior’s as well as settin’ up Guy for his globe trottin’ adventures. It seems that Buck was always footin’ the bill for repairs at Warrior’s as every bad guy in the DCU was always crashin’ the party.
Buck and The Monster Hunters were the first people in the DC Universe that treated Guy with respect. It was during Guy’s time with them that he finally began to grow and mature as a man. By issue #44, the bowl headed jerk was wrung out of Guy Gardner and there was nothing but a testosterone fueled, ass kickin’ machine standing in his place.
Originally, artist Mitch Byrd and I didn’t want Guy to have any super powers after the deconstruction of the Green Lanterns a few years back. Our plans were for him to join up with Buck and the gang and have adventures all over the world doin’ things like takin’ on the Loch Ness Monster, Bigfoot, Yeti, what really happened at Roswell, New Mexico as well as other unsolved mysteries and armies of bad guys. By the way, it was artist and very good friend, Brad Gorby that helped me design Buck Wargo and The Monster Hunters.
At the time, DC didn’t think the readers would go for a hero without powers and tights, so we developed the Warrior powers? that got way outta hand.
Buck Wargo and The Monster Hunters proved to be fan favorites with the readers. We got lots of mail askin’ for more on em’. At one time there was talk of them havin’ their own mini-series. That would have been a bar full of fun.
Who knows? Maybe one day we will have the ultimate bar room brawl with Buck and The Monster Hunters. Stranger things have happened in comics. I might still be young enough to write em’. Lord knows I’ll always be manly enough.
So, next time you’re in the shower feelin’ creative, think of me–unless you’re a guy. If that happens turn the water on ice cold and burn the memory of me from your sick little mind. Ya sure don’t want me to beat those thoughts out of ya.
Wynonna Earp News Update
As of today the count of free Wynonna Earp prints that I sent out to those that requested it is up to 654. An amazing amount that went well beyond my own manly expectations. Requests came in from all over the world. If all these people ordered The Complete Wynonna Earp Collection, then we’re off to an excellent start. I thank all of you that have backed me on this. I won’t let ya down. You have my word on it. You stragglers better get your requests in. There’s not many free prints left! Send em’ to me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Punch Out Your Lights, The Party’s Over
Been a really busy weekend. I’ve gotta grab some sleep. I hope this week is a manly week for ya. I’ll have some exciting news for ya real soon here at Busted Knuckles. I hope you’re around for it. In the mean time, let me know what’s on your mind. I ain’t hard to find. I also wanna thank regular Busted Knuckles reader and full time “Knucklehead”, Tim Kretzer from Ohio for givin’ us all the sign off saying for this week:
M.M.M. Make Mine Manly!
The Flying Fist Ranch
P.O. Box 706
Ceredo, WV. 25507
Prove your manhood by visiting Beau at the Flying Fists Forum!