Happy slightly belated Labor Day! We here at Comics Bulletin hope you had a great and very relaxing weekend of hiking, barbecues and time spent rereading Justice League #1, because the new Justice League has obviously turned the internet in half.
The appearance of the new Justice League comic got us wondering: which members of Earth’s Greatest Heroes work the hardest every day? Our #1 might be a bit obvious, but could there really be any other choice?
Dishonorable Mention: Blue Beetle
Ted Kord basically funded all his awesome inventions from profits from his failing business that he inherited from his family. Then, to console himself about his business failures, Ted started eating… and eating… and eating. Listen, plenty of us struggle with our weight, including this writer, but none of us put on a skintight costume and fight evil. Of course, Ted also liked to spend a lot of time sitting on the couch instead of fighting…
Hawkman loves ancient weapons, so you know he’s got to work hard to keep that mace working well. Hawkman’s also a space cop, chasing down criminals. Then he also spends time chasing a very special woman. And he’s got to work hard to keep up with all his different origins! Add it all up and you have a guy who knows the value of hard work.
Do you have any idea how huge a space sector really is? Some of those alien races are really needy. And the Green Lantern of Sector 2814 doesn’t just have to help alien races. He also has to help the very greedy and complicated Earthlings. Oh yeah, and he also has to fly fighter planes for a living. You gotta wonder when Hal has time for his womanizing…
If anyone knows how much work it takes to fill the Bat-suit, it has to be Dick Grayson. He’s always gotta be the smartest man in the room, has to spend lots of time tracking down some of the most evil men in Gotham City, and above and beyond that he has to mentor Damien so he can be the next Batman. At least Dick manages to take a little bit more of a break than Bruce usually does. He’s only 98% obsessed!
She’s a top fashion model. Do you have any idea how busy it is being a top fashion model? Me neither, but models sure like whining about it. And now in the Internet era, she has to find a way to make extra money modeling on the web – though not quite everyone’s image of “Brazilian” pictures.
Nobody works harder to solve a crime than the stretchable sleuth. Ralph always throws himself completely into every case that he investigates, usually with his beloved wife Jean at his side. (For the millionth time, I don’t believe in the events of Identity Crisis) Ralph may have super-stretching abilities, but his real superpower is his great brain for finding the truth behind crimes.
I have a feeling that no character is going to come out of the DCnU with more newfound love than the King of the Seven Seas. The man from Atlantis is insanely busy being the King – if you think it’s hard being Barack Obama, imagine being Arthur Curry! – but he still finds time to hang with his friends in the super-hero world. Because screw you, Entourage guys. Aquaman is pretty awesome.
Do you have any idea how much work it takes to be a world class break dancer? You gotta work crazy hard to be good at it. Look at that image below and see how great the man in the beautiful rockin’ yellow outfit is at his job. Ever wonder why Vibe deserved to be a member of Justice League Detroit? That panel answers your question in just one stop.
He’s an Air Force Captain with responsibilities to keep our world safe. He also is covered in metal and shoots molten plasma out of his hands. Besides being bad-ass, that means he’s crazy busy. The life of an Air Force Captain is busy enough, with the plane flying and stuff, but to be a hero too – that’s work, my friends.
I love how they never stopped finding new super-powers for Superman back in the day. Super-ventriloquism, super-intelligence, and of course, super-disco dancing. Just look at Clark busting some awesome John Travolta movies. The best part? You just know that this panel was part of his never-ending battle, some crazy way to defeat Lex Luthor’s latest scheme.
Come on, as if anyone else would come close. Nobody works harder than Bruce. He’s relentless, the ultimate fighter. Bruce is the kind of guy who works unbelievably hard art brushing his teeth, let alone fighting evil. Nobody else could top this list. Because that’s who Batman is. Batman always wins.