Well, hello there Knuckleheads! Grab a seat and get comfortable! Do you like the new drapes? I felt this place needed a “woman’s touch”, it is much better now don’t you think?
So you are wondering why I am here instead of your precious Beau Smith. Calm the hell down and let me tell you! My name is Ronée Garcia Bourgeois and I write a column called “What a Girl Wants” over at Buzzscope. (Yeah, I know you don’t care.) Point is, I have been reading this testosterone filled Twinkie written by Cowboy Beau and felt the need to tie him up? I mean, help him out by stepping in this week and telling you some REALLY manly things.
Now before you get your panties in a bunch, it is not what you think. I am not the typical Lady. No shrinking violet here. In case you have not guessed I happen to be one of those loud-mouthed broads who tend to rub people in the industry the wrong way now and then. Seems women who tell it like they see it ruffle feathers in this community. Go figure.
That is right, folks; you get a healthy dose of a WOMAN telling you what you need. And you will like it. Seriously, you will. Or so help me I will get the Dominatrix gear out and shove one of those gag balls in your mouth and throw you in the basement with Beau!
What I have decided to do with this opportunity is tell all of you and Beau about properties I think he should be working on right away to give his oh so manly touch to. So, without further ado I give you?
Manly Comics That Beau Needs To Write
This first story has it all. Cowboys, the west, cattle and you know, dirty stuff like that. What could be manlier than a story of two young cowboys hired to work cattle? A coming of age story with all the trimmings. Set against the sweeping vistas of Wyoming and Texas and telling the story of two young men, a ranch-hand and a rodeo cowboy who meet in the summer of 1963 and unexpectedly forge a lifelong connection.It has the west, big cowboy hats, and livestock oh and that homosexual angle. Of course, I speak of doing a comic book adaptation of Brokeback Mountain.
I know what you are thinking? Genius!
Okay, okay, maybe not such a good idea after all. Let’s move on.
How about a good psychological thriller? Say a story of an agent who kidnaps a man and in guarding this man he becomes somewhat of a friend. He even promises to look in on the prisoner’s girlfriend if something should happen to him. After the untimely death of the captive, the captor is true to his word and finds the girlfriend only to fall into a passionate affair. Right there you have intrigue, action, sex and mystery! Trés Manly!
Oh, and the fact that the girlfriend is in actually a man. A fact that the man did not KNOW until after the affair got very physical.
Comic book adaptation of “The Crying Game”. Big fun for Beau.
I know that when he returns he will be elated by my suggestions.
Now on to this week’s Manly Comic Book Cover:
Yes, I have picked you knuckleheads a peach this time! This cover is ALL man!
Behold INCUBUS POCKET MANGA VOLUME 1 GN by Yayoi Neko.
What happens when your “wet dreams” become reality? Shy and prudish Judas has spent many nights resisting the seduction of a persistent incubus named Lenniel. When he assumes human form, asking only for Judas’ love, Judas is faced with a profound decision! This book is full of man-love and graphic in its detail. Good stuff!
And finally, the traditional Babe Of The Week:
Yes that is right folks I have chosen Beau Smith as this weeks winner. And why not? He’s rugged, manly, exudes confidence and looks OH so good gagged and bound in my basement! *sigh* Of course I am a sucker for a submissive man. I can’t wait to get back there and torture him a bit more!
But before I go I have one more thing to say. Beau’s “Beer Fridge” pic may be telling you something other than manly man. Look closely. Rolling Rock light in a CAN and Smirnoff Ice?? Not very testosteronie!! It just seems a bit too girlie for me. I have Guinness, Negra Modelo and Bud Light in MY fridge. And the Bud is only there for my pansy-ass husband! Does it seem strange that I just out-manned the master?? Not to me.
Oh and if you want to see where Beau is right now check out http://www.buzzscope.com/comics and look for the latest “What A Girl Wants”? I told you he was a pansy.
Prove your manhood by visiting Beau at the Flying Fists Forum!