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Home
Columns

Top 10 Truths The New “Fantastic Four” Movie Will Ignore

Chris Wunderlich
April 28, 2015
Columns, Top 10

Even before it was officially announced, the new Fantastic Four movie has been causing quite a stir. A much younger cast? A black Human Torch? Using the Ultimate Fantastic Four stories as reference? Frankly, I don’t care about any of that. It’s the fact that this new film will ignore these ten important truths that has me in an uproar.

The Thing’s true origins…

thingring

Reed Richard’s true talent—woodworking!

woodworking

Johnny Storm’s true talent—rapping! (and yes, this is absolutely real)

flameonsong

The true producer responsible for this reboot—Namor.

namorsmovie

The true face of Doctor Doom… (pick one)

doomface composite

The team’s true origins…

FF1994

The true story behind the character’s codenames…

names

The team’s true arch-nemesis…

hitler

The truth behind Johnny Storm’s flameless, temporary replacement, H.E.R.B.I.E…

herbie

The true motivation behind the group’s gathering and first failed mission…

doomplot

Ben GrimmDoctor DoomDr. DoomFantastic FourHERBIEHuman TorchInvisible WomanJohnny StormMarvelMovieMr. FantasticNamorReed RichardsSue StormThe Thing

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About The Author

<a href="https://comicsbulletin.com/byline/chris-wunderlich/" rel="tag">Chris Wunderlich</a>
Chris Wunderlich

Usually buried under a pile of glorious, cheap back issues, Chris Wunderlich occasionally emerges to play guitar for Toronto-based bands Rhyme Jaws and Mellowkotzen. He also shoots and edits videos for Nice Move Media and anyone else who asks nicely.

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